found myself lost?

I found myself a little lost today.

isn't it ironic

that I "found" myself "lost".

but, in such contradictions

we lie.

and to think of lying

in the form of resting,

or in the form of unfaithfulness,

not to anyone else

but to oneself?

questions about what

I feel about myself

have been taking over

my mind for some time now,

but, the fear

of making something transient

last a little longer

than it actually would be

makes me not want write about it.

this momentary thoughts

of darkness of night sky

over the beauty of the moon,

and looking for something black

in the bright blue sunny sky.

maybe I am wrong about it,

no,

I am wrong about this,

and maybe everything else

but wait for me

till I find my way again.

for now,

I will embrace this.

so, I will hide

behind more metaphors again.

indirectly saying what I want to let out

read me?

temporarily.

till I learn to love myself again.

12th October, 2022